Losing Your Author Virginity

My birthday party was canceled due to weather, my sitter falling through at the last minute and that rascally migraine creeping back up on me. I wasn't too upset, I mean it's my 31st - not like it was my 21st (aww shit, that was 10 years ago, a decade....*feeling of old settling in*)

Luckily, the night before the party was awesome and helped make up for the lack of partying down. Now brace yourselves, I realize this entry may not make YOU jump out of your skin quite like it did to me but I'm posting it anyway and there will be no humorous stories about my children or situations from daily life explained with an overuse of satire. Should this list of absent items not have made you run off I might be able to further entice you into stayingand reading by noting that this entry has nothing to do with Twilight. Ahhh, see I knew that would catch you.

So, Friday night, yes here we go.

Amy, Nikki and Christy and I set off to Minneapolis for a discussion and book signing with The Merry Sisters of Fate: Tessa Gratton, Maggie Stiefvater and Brenna Yovanoff. (If you don't know who these girls are, it is your duty to go fotrth and buy every word they have written and read. Read damn you, read!)

Amy called this "Losing my Author Virginity" because I had never before met an author. Movie stars, pshhh sure but never an actual, live in the flesh author! Not only did I meet them I spoke to them (with only partially geeking out) and even got their autographs in their respective books. Well except in the case of Tessa, who's book isn't out yet. Amy was smart enough however to print off her book cover and so she's signed that for me instead.

They were all kind enough to take group and individual photos with us and even participated in some general chit chat. It was a great evening, I even learned a lot from the discussion on good critique partners - and to be honest I wasn't sure I'd take anything away from the discussion. Mostly because before I got there I had no idea what the topic was....

Anyway - to visit these ladies individually or all together follow these links.

The Merry Sisters of Fate Live Journal (full of awesome short stories!)

Maggie Stiefvater and her books Shiver, Linger and Forever

Tessa Gratton and her forthcoming book Blood Magic

Brenna Yovanoff and her book The Replacement

School Picture Day...Oh The Terror!

School pictures were today for Paige. I was pumped because last year her father had her and while she looked ok, little things like her head band not matching her outfit in even the slightest way irritated the crap out of me. Mostly because if I'm shelling out money for these things I want them to look good.

I'm sure she chose the head band, in which case it's great because it makes the photo more "her", but still a little gentle coaxing for a more complimentary color wouldn't have hurt either.

This year I wanted to make school photo day fun. I dreaded it when I was a kid. Like I needed a forever reminder of how stupid I looked in school. So I took Paige to the mall to find a shirt. This is mistake number 1. Telling her she can have whatever she wants with in a budget, that was mistake number 2.

We started in Carter's, they have stuff in her size still that's cute, and she is only 6 after all. After choosing a hideous collection of bright green and purple (no doubt her way of saying she's both a Packers and Vikings fan?) items, I suggested we try another store and if we didn't find anything we could come back for that outfit.

We scurried off to The Children's Place. I can always find something in there! YIKES! While their new line is cute - it is also a sequined mess of black, red and silver and, well not for school photos. Not to mention I wasn't dropping $40 on a "jacket thing" Paige could have borrowed from Michal Jacksons closet...not like he's using it right now.....(okay - bad joke....shut up - you laughed!)

At this point I'm getting worried. I know the next place Paige is going to want to hit is Justice and I like the store but the prices don't like my pocket book. I will have no problem shelling out the money for $50 jeans when she stops growing out of things 10 minutes after buying them. Luckily for me that will also be right about the time she's old enough to get a job and buy the damn things herself. See, and people think I'm stupid....

I suggest Herberger's. Paige says, and I quote: "Ugh. I hate that place" and then drags her feet causing her flip flops to make this flip, shhhhhhhhh, flop combination of sounds. I thought that was irritating enough, I was not prepared for what she was going to do in the store once we got there.

I was unaware until this particular trip that she has a shopping radar built in, and it targets any ugly, loud, and resembling a color-blind-90-year-old-hippies-couch, item there is in a store. She hunted down and gazed lovingly at each item with a smile the size of Texas stretching across her face. Desire flowed from her eyes as she held each abandoned and highly clearanced item like it was a puppy in a shelter looking for a good home.

The really obnoxious items were easy to shoot down, using the "Paige, we're not going to see a lot of your shirt anyway so we don't really want a lot of design on it" this made me wonder why the hell we were shopping anyway, I could have put her in PJ's and called it a day for her photos...but I apparently like making life difficult.

Then she abandoned the idea of a shirt all together and went for these....oh yes - that's NEON folks. I couldn't even justify wasting words on a response so I pointed to the rack they came from then walked away silently praying that God could grant her some fashion sense in the next 15 minutes.

I knew I had no choice left, I asked if she wanted to go to Justice and off we ran. Literally. Mostly because I was scared some of the clothes she had picked up would come chasing after me for having mocked it to it's face.

In Justice, Paige was in awe. Much like me in a book store. She walked around and touched everything hanging. Forgetting now and then we were clothes shopping and wandering over to those damned ZuZu pet things. Luckily for me (read: Alex and the bank account) the whole store was 40% off.

She started grabbing everything that, if it could speak would be screaming at an ear splitting volume. I reminded her of the "not a lot of the shirt being seen" thing and off she went again to hunt. Of course everything I held up was a no. Then there was a SPECIFIC COLOR she had to have. Then her size was out of everything in that color. God help me. Oh and did I mention Justin Bieber is playing over the sound system the entire time, giving a soundtrack to my own personal hell.

I keep looking at my watch thinking we have to get going soon and then it happens. She finds it. The shirt. Something we can all agree on. The entire store went dark and a spot light shown on the beautiful garment in the right color and size. Justin shut his lesbian looking mouth and a choir of angels began to sing.....and just as quickly as it started...the sound of a needle scratching a record sounded and it was over. I looked at the price tag. Mistake number 3.

It wasn't horribly expensive, it was just more then I'd spend on the same shirt for me. And even though I am a crazy clearance shopper for myself, this was still a lot for a shirt for a 6 year old she will wear 4 times and then grow out of.

At this point I just didn't care, so I grabbed the shirt before I changed my mind, swiped my credit card which made a small crying sound as it passed through the machine and walked away a lot broker then I intended but with a very happy 6 year old.

So help me, I don't know what I'll so when she's 15. Pray for me.

Here's her outfit, never mind the iphone camera quality of the pics....

New Obsession....The Wolves of Mercy Falls

Shiver.

Linger.

In 9 months - Forever. The third and final book in the Wolves of Mercy Falls series.

No. I'm not pregnant are you out of your damned mind! It't a book. Keep up.

Maggie Stiefvater is my new literary hero.

Yes she writes YA (young adult for the door knobs out there) but she's me. You know that sarcastic kick I give to everything. That way I write when I talk to you like you're really there, and you love it I know you do. I could crawl right into her books (and to steal a line from her book) live between the pages.

And it's not just because I live in Minnesota and that's where the books take place.

So "Forever" is due out in July and I'm literally hanging on by a thread to get it. And since there's enough time betwen now and then - order your copies of the first two - and then toss out your order for a LEGITIMATE AUTOGRAPHED copy of Forever by Clicking HERE, here, or even HERE (they all go to the same place, chill out those of you with ADD)

Get it now. When they make a movie out of it - and they are - you want to have been on on the Book Love....not just the movie love.